Happy Birthday Brother
by Karen Winchester
Summary: Dean's never liked to celebrate his birthdays, and sometimes he has even forgotten about that special day. But Sam never does This is a multi chapter fiction, where we will see how Sam celebrates Dean's birthdays through the years and the different situations that they are living. Disclaimer: I don't own anything Warning: Sam and Dean are too cute for their own good. :)
1. Chapter 1

Happy Birthday Brother 

_I'd follow you  
To the end of the world if only you would ask me to  
On and on we go, my brother I've got you  
Nothing to stop us now, because we found in life  
What's true  
Oh my brother I'd follow you  
And we had howl through the night  
Call the stars by the fire shining on  
Through the night  
We will run, to the rising life and on  
Through the night, burn the flames  
The world will know our Names  
_

SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNPSNPSNPSNPSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN

YEAR 1999

JANUARY 24TH

Sam woke up in another motel with the sunlight planning a surprise for his brother's birthday. Dean was 20 years old, and he was probably the only one that was excited about that. Their father never remembered their birthdays, and Dean was accustomed to ignore the special date, taking a hunt to work with like any other day.

Sam woke up earlier than his brother and father, and once he picked some new underwear and clean clothes decided that later he would go and buy some beers and M&M'S. He could buy some "Busty Asian Beauties" too, but he was ashamed just thinking of the idea that the man or woman who was working in it would laugh at him. Once he was out of the shower, dressed and his hair was brushed, saw that the two men were still dreaming.

On his 15th birthday, Dean took him to a water park with some money that he had kept from the food money, given by his father. Being honest, they had had a blast and stayed from 10:00 AM to 19:00 PM hours. By that night, both were tired as hell, and when John knew that that supposed job was not a simple salt and burn, he got pissed. Dean confronted him and explained that that had been his idea. Both paid that mistake with some extra running time, cleaning the guns and washing their clothes, including his father's ones.

Dean seemed not to be scared of their dad, but he was, so on this birthday he would keep the same and usual surprise that they had given to each other almost every year.

Sam took his father's money from his coat's pocket and decided that it was time to go, before the men would wake up and ask questions..

It was 8:45 AM when he opened the door of the motel and saw his very furious family seeing him with angry faces

"Where have you been Sam? You know the drill. You go, you leave a note!"

"I… I'm Sorry… I didn't…"

"That won't fix anything Sam. We were worried about you! How could you do that to us? You know what's out there, and you didn't even tell us where you went! I think that I deserve some explanations, son"

"I went to bring us breakfast sir. Nothing more than that"

"Sam. Next time you do that I am gonna kick your ass. As your big brother, I am able to do that, so don't push me"

"I am sorry, ok?! I really am"

Sam stared at the men silent, giving them his famous puppy dog eyes, waiting to see if that trick still worked. Dean gave him a pissed look, but a little smile that vanished as soon as it appeared

"Dad, he just made a mistake. You remember that time when I did the same thing, and I was even younger than him?"

"I know what you are doing son. You have to stop doing that. Sam needs to face the consequences of his acts, and you can't keep protecting him. He's big boy now"

"Dad, come on. He has learned the lesson. Right Sammy… I mean Samuel?"

"Yes, sir (Little smile) I have learned my lesson. Next time I will leave a note. I promise"

"You two are impossible. I am serious boys. You need to be responsible for your own acts. Next time you'll run 15 more minutes than the usual timing, understand?"

"Yes, sir"

"If you defend your brother's mistakes, you will do the same thing Dean"

"Yes, sir"

John went to take a bath and both boys started laughing in silence. It was sort of funny to watch John get frustrated and trying to end the conversation. He was right, but at the same time, he was too strict, and all that they wanted to have (sometimes) was a little fun times in "serious" situations that shouldn't even happen.

"Listen Sammy. I am not getting in trouble because of you again, so next time I will just watch dad make you run til you are sweating and wash clothes. That'd be funny though, Samantha"

"Shut up Dean. I was not only bringing breakfast"

"What else could you be doing, huh? Do you have a girl around? Sammy the Hound Dog!"

"No. I was not doing that either"

"Then what? I am losing my patience here, dude"

"Happy birthday Dean!"

"What...? Oh, I forgot about it. I don't want to do anything Sammy. We have work to do and you know that"

"I know it. I knew that you were going to forget your birthday, so I brought you something"

Sam pointed the bag that he hid in one corner of the room when John and Dean were not looking at him, and saw how his older brother walked towards it. When he opened the plastic bag, saw an expensive beer that they could not always afford, and two bags of M&M'S.

"Thank you Sammy! This is great!"

"You are welcome Dean. Better hide that in your duffel before dad gets out of the bathroom. He'll be pissed"

"Do you doubt that? You know that I like you, right? You usually are a pain in the ass, but sometimes, you are not. Really man, thank you for everything you gave me. Where did you take the money from?"

"Umm… Dad's pocket?"

"You're a dead man, Sammy. I'll give him part of my money to compensate"

"Don't, Dean. I can face Dad. You don't have to…"

"Yes I do, Sam. What are big brothers for then?"

"Jerk"

"Bitch"

One minute after John came out of the bathroom with his hair wet and new clothes, saw the boys just sitting and watching TV with their breakfasts in hand.

John took his coffee and sat there with them. He had heard it all, but he didn't care. He had forgotten his older son's birthday (again), and later he'd say "I am sorry" for that. He was proud of his boys, and loved how much they cared about each other. However, even he would never say that, they knew that.

When they all finished eating and drinking, John showed them the next case that he had found in the newspaper. They would have to drive 12 hours to get there, but it did not matter, because it was just "another normal day"

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE** **: HEY GUYS! SO, THIS IS GOING TO BE A MULTI CHAPTER FIC WITH SAM AND DEAN. JOHN WILL ONLY BE IN THIS CHAPTER, AND OTHER CHARACTERS WILL BE TOO AS I KEEP WRITING. IF YOU LIKE THIS FIRST CHAPTER OR YOU WANT TO GIVE ME SOME IDEAS, REVIEW! THAT'D MEAN THE WORLD TO ME.** **J**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

 _Who knows how long  
I've been awake now?  
The shadows on my wall don't sleep  
They keep calling me  
Beckoning, beckoning_

 _Who knows what's right?  
The lines keep getting thinner  
My age has never made me wise  
But I keep pushing on and on and on and on_

 _There's nothing left to say now  
I'm giving up, giving up, hey, giving up now_

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN**

YEAR 2004

Sam was in the little kitchen of his new apartment while his girlfriend was taking a bath. He was happy, because this year would be the first birthday that he would celebrate of her, being together as a couple. In three hours, it would be January 24, and they were going to celebrate it in their place , but it was Dean's birthday as well. The first two years that he had been alone in College during those days, he would try to forget about his brother's birthday studying or watching movies on TV. He cared about him, but he never sent him a message or called him. It was not that he didn't want to do that, because he felt that he had to. Every fiber on his body was shouting at him to do the right thing. He hadn't done it because he was sure that Dean was still mad, or maybe even disappointed of him.

Sam was still remembering like it was yesterday the moment when he said goodbye to his family, and John told him that if he wanted to go, he should stay gone forever. He was not a Winchester, not since the moment he threw to the trash the life that he should be still living (according to his father), and instead chose to have a normal life. The pain that he felt every time that he remembered that, destroyed his security and way of thinking. Many times, he had wondered if what he had chosen was right.

Maybe Dean and his dad were right, and he should be saving people. However, as soon as those thoughts would appear, were gone. Even if he'd want to come back, John wouldn't let him.

This was the third year that he was going to be away from his brother, and even if it hurt like hell, he was used to the habit of being away from him. Dean had been, and still was his hero, his number one person in the entire world, but things had changed between them. The last time that he had seen him was last year. He was going to his apartment with some friends and saw the black Impala parked at the other side of the street. Dean was in it, and as soon his older sibling saw that he recognized him, turned his "Baby's" engine on and left.

Sam heard a voice calling him that distracted him from his thoughts, but until the second call, he didn't react. He had lost himself inside his mind again. That's why he hated that time of the year. He didn't need to remember that. He was supposed to be happy, start a new life!

"Sam. Come here love"

"What Jess?"

"Help me with this dress. I can't zip the zipper"

"It's because your hands are too short"

"Ha ha! That was not funny. You know that not everybody's like you, right?"

"I guess that I am special then"

"Yes. You are. But you are my special man"

Jessica turned around when Sam finished zipping the dress and kissed him while looking at him.

"I am yours. I'll always be yours"

Sam took Jessica in his arms and started heading towards their room. The bed was made and everything was in its place, just like both always wanted. Both were very perfectionists, which was the reason why their friends always made a mess as soon as they'd come inside the apartment just too see their faces and laugh.

"No, Sam. We can't do this now. You know that my parents will come in one hour and I still have to finish my hair and put some make-up on my face. The bags under my eyes are killing me. I blame college and you. You keep me awake at night"

"Are you sure about that? An hour is a lot of time. You never say "No" to my offer, lady. It is your fault as well"

"You're an idiot. But I love you"

"I love you too Jess"

Sam gave up and let Jess go to the living room. He had to take a bath and pick a suit to use. Since he had been living there, had a lot of clothes that didn't fit in a single bag. He had always used the same flannels, jeans and underwear until they would be overused, and John would have to replace all of it with an angry face. Now, having new and perfumed clothes felt like a real home. He even had drawers to organize them! He knew that that sounded stupid, but for him that was happiness.

Two hours later, it was 00:00, and everybody started singing "Happy Birthday" to her. In the small place were Jessica's parents and younger brother, her grandparents and their friends. He wished that Dean was there, with his typical out of place comment. He never thought he'd miss Dean's laugh every time that he'd give him his "Bitch face". God, he missed the little moments with his family so much!

It was 02:45 AM, and everybody was gone. Jess and him cleaned their home before she headed to bed. Within twenty minutes, she was out cold. He was tired, really tired, but he couldn't sleep. His thoughts were keeping him awake against his will. What was Dean doing? Would John remember his older son's birthday? Was Dean still expecting a message from him after such a long time without even saying hello to each other?

He exhaled and decided that he had to let Jessica sleep without him making noises and moving in the bed every ten seconds. Sam got up carefully, heading to the kitchen and graving a cold beer. By the time he watched the clock, saw that it was 03:32, and by the influence of the three beers that he drank, took his phone and called his brother

His conscious part was telling him to end the call, but he was too wasted to do the right thing

" _Hi"_

 _"_ _Dean"_

 _"_ _Sam? Something happened?"_

 _"_ _No. I… I amm fine"_

 _"_ _Are you drunk?"_

 _"_ _No"_

 _"_ _My ass you're fine"_

 _"_ _Really, D'n. I amm f…fine"_

 _"_ _I am not trying to be rude here, Sammy. But is there a reason why you called? It's like four in the morning dude, and you've never called me until now"_

 _"_ _I… I thought that you hated me. That's why I never called you. 'm sorry D'n, for everything"_

 _"_ _I am not mad at you. I could never hate you dumbass! I just… Let's just let it go, okay?"_

 _"_ _Happy Birthday Dee"_

 _"_ _Thank you, College boy. I thought that you had forgotten about it"_

 _"_ _I never forgot your birthday. Never did and I never will"_

 _"_ _Listen Sammy. I can tell that you will pass out any minute, so why don't you go to sleep and drink some coffee in the morning? You are going to have a big headache when you wake up. Never saw… heard you like this before"_

 _"_ _Things change Dean. I have changed"_

 _"_ _Alright, Sasquatch. It's time for bed, like right now"_

 _"_ _I miss you Dee"_

 _"_ _I know. Maybe someday I'll go to say hello. How does that sound Sammy?"_

 _"_ _Fine"_

 _"_ _Good night jerk"_

 _"_ _Good night Bitch"_

Sam ended the call and cried in silence for the next hour. He had missed his brother's voice more that he thought, and he was happy that Dean didn't hate him. He knew that Dean wouldn't show up. He was busy hunting and saving people. However, he would always have him by his side, and for now he was "fine" like that. Dean could have forgotten about him, but he loved him too much to do that. Maybe someday things would change again and his brother would be a part of his new life, because being honest he never left.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE: First of all, happy new year everybody! I "wrote" the whole chapter inside my mind and then passed it to paper. If you enjoyed it, leave a review!** **J**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

And some days I can't even trust myself  
It's killing me to see you this way

'Cause though the truth may vary  
This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore

Soon it will all be over, and buried with our past  
We used to play outside when we were young  
And full of life and full of love

Some days I don't know if I am wrong or right.

Don't listen to a word I say, the screams all sound the same  
Though the truth may vary this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNPSNSPNSPN**

YEAR 2008

 **PRESENT TIME/ JANUARY 24**

 **04:32 AM**

 **FEW HOURS BEFORE DEAN'S BIRTHDAY…**

The motel room was silent as the boys slept. Out there, it was the middle of the night. Some dogs were barking, and even cars were making loud noises around the area as they passed through the road, however, neither of them heard those noises that could freak somebody out. They never slept in a fancy place, but it was the sacrifice of their job, right? It had been hard at first when they were able to resonate and understand that there were better things out there, as they were growing up, but now they could sleep in the middle of a parade if they had to. Habits could be good sometimes, or that was what Sam thought every night of his life as a hunter.

 **JANUARY 23** **RD**

After chasing a lead to a possible werewolf, they discovered that it was not a supernatural monster, but a real werewolf attacking people. They took the animal down and left before someone would notice them.

Dean was pissed and cursing out loud while driving them to a place where they could close their eyes, and Sam was trying to avoid his brother's bad and explosive mood.

He was frustrated as well, but he had other things to worry about. Actually, he cared about one thing only, and that was Dean's deal.

Time was flying by, and he still hadn't found a way to break the stupid contract. Dean was trying to pretend that he didn't care, but Sam was not stupid. He knew how scared his older brother was, and he was tired of asking him to talk about it. If he didn't want to talk, Sam wouldn't push him, because that wasn't going to do any good to them. Their relationship was getting worse as the days went by, and they had had more fights than he could count. Not even as kids they fought so bad.

Dean acted like that two times or three as a teenage with him, but back then things were easier. He didn't have a reason to worry about. Now, under this horrible circumstance, Sam didn't want to lose his brother even before he would if he didn't save him.

Even if he'd have to die as a consequence of his freedom, he wanted his brother to be happy, and stop caring about him. Dean's suicidal attitude was driving him crazy! Dean wanted to protect him like he always did, but he didn't care about himself if he would get hurt or was bleeding out to death. That had to stop, or he would punch that pretty face of his.

Just like the old version of Dean Winchester said once during a case, "what is dead, should stay dead", and that was what Dean should have done. His body should be underground or burned until he would be ashes.

How could Dean do that to him, knowing what their father's deal made to him?

He couldn't blame him though, because deep inside, if Dean had died, he would have done the very same selfish act without caring about his brother's pissed face and hurtful words towards him.

Until the last minute, he'd try to find a way to save him, even if that meant lying to him about where he was going or why he was getting drunk, every time that they were not looking for a hunt, after a failure on his mission to freed his brother. At this point, he was not thinking like the old innocent Sam used to think, but he knew that that Sam was gone now. He didn't want to overthink things. Getting drunk worked, so he would keep doing that. If Dean would die, he was (probably) going to join him soon. He couldn't live with Dean dead either. It was like being in the middle of the desert without any oasis. There was no chance that he would make it. None.

 _"_ _Sam! Are you even listening to me?!"_

 _"_ _I am here. I was listening to you"_

 _"_ _Oh, yeah? So, if you really were, tell me what was I talking about"_

 _"_ _A hunt that we have to search for tomorrow. I don't know Dean! I am tired. I can focus on anything right now"_

 _"_ _I was telling you that a bullet's missing from the colt. I didn't do it. So, conclusion, it was you!"_

 _"_ _I didn't do anything Dean"_

" _You didn't do anything good. Why did you use it? You have to give me a good explanation or any other way I will kick your ass. You know that the colt is really important to us, Sam!"_

" _Dean…"_

 _"_ _Don't Dean me, Sam!"_

 _"_ _Look. I was trying to break the deal. A demon was a smartass, and I had to kill that thing"_

 _"_ _You could've used a knife. That is not an excuse, and you know that. If dad were here…"_

 _"_ _Dad's not here, alright? Can you please stop being so mad at me, or everything that happens lately? You are a freaking child!"_

 _"_ _I am mad because you are reckless, Sam. You think that you can save me when you know that there is no way out of this one. I am going to hell and you have to accept it. I don't care what you're doing, but I am going to give you a fair warning. Stop using the Colt's bullets and running away at night, or help me God…"_

 _"_ _I am not apologizing for what I've done. I am going to get you free. You can't control me anymore Dean. I am an adult and I will do whatever I want"_

 _"_ _Yeah, because that is what every adult says, right Sammy? What you just said gave even more reason. You are acting like a teenager. You don't listen to me; you go away without any explanation or letter!"_

 _"_ _Like I said, I am not apologizing for anything. When I get you free you will have to say sorry"_

 _"_ _If"_

 _"_ _If?"_

 _"_ _If you can free me from the deal. Which you can't and won't be able to. Why can't you accept that I am right, and you are wrong for one freaking time Sam! To have been in college does not give you the right to believe that you know everything about everything!"_

 _"…"_

 _"So, the silence treatment again, huh Sammy?"_

 _"_ _You are stupid Dean. You'd do the same thing and you know that! I should be dead. You are my brother Dean, and I don't care what it takes, I am going to save you. You are not going to burn in hell flames"_

 _"_ _This won't end up good Sam. I made my peace with everything. You are alive and we both know that I shouldn't be here. Dad sacrificed himself for me and he was wrong. I was not worth it. He deserved to live"_

 _"_ _You deserved to live too, Dean! You are worth it! People make sacrifices for other people when they love them. Dad loved you!"_

 _"_ _Whatever Sam. Let that go. You know that I am tired of the same fight over and over again. I am done with everything"_

Sam faced the window of the passenger seat and closed his eyes. He knew that he wouldn't be able to sleep, but at least that was going to work to avoid Dean again. He needed the silence as much as Dean did.

A harsh knock on the window brought him back to reality, and moments later, he was heading to the motel room to finally close his eyes and relax his stressed body and mind.

 **JANUARY 24** **TH**

 **Present time**

When Sam woke up exalted by a nightmare saw that it was 05:45 AM. He hadn't slept much, but few hours was better than nothing, he thought while rubbing his eyes and brushing his teeth.

That day was Dean's birthday, and despite the fight that they had had few hours ago, knew that he had to celebrate it. That birthday would be the last one that (probably) his older brother was going to be by his side. He had to make his brother smile, at least a little.

Once he was dressed, went to buy some breakfast for both of them. He bought as well the magazine "Busty Asian Beauties" and a newspaper to check on some case to work on. The woman that was working on the market gave him a wink and wrote her number in one of the pages of the magazine. Before he went away from the shop, she said in low voice "Call me and you won't need to use that"

Sam blushed feeling uncomfortable and headed to the exit door as fast as he could without running. That was why he didn't like to buy those magazines. The things that he did for his brother…

When he was in front of the door, heard that Dean was on the phone with somebody. He placed all the things that he was carrying on the floor and listened to the conversation carefully.

" _I know Bobby. Believe me that I know it, but he won't stop pushing me! He acts just like he did when dad died. He can be annoying when he wants to"_

 _"_ _..."_

 _"_ _You have to promise me something. No! Listen to me Bobby! Sorry for that. You have to promise me that you will look after him when I am gone. He's going to be destroyed and I need him to be fine… I made this deal because I had no choice. I couldn't live with him being dead"_

 _"…"_

 _"_ _You don't need to repeat the same thing again, for God's sake! He's strong. Eventually, he'll find a girl and even go back to be a college boy. He won't forget me, but he'll learn to love without me in his life"_

 _"…"_

 _"_ _Whatever Bobby. I have to take a bath. See ya in few days alright?"_

 _"…"_

 _"_ _Bye"_

Sam took all of the stuff and opened the door slowly. He saw his brother picking up some clothes and underwear

" _Hey"_

 _"_ _Hey"_

 _"_ _Where were you? I thought about looking for you in a bar, but you surprised me"_

 _"_ _Dean, come on… I brought breakfast"_

 _"_ _Hmm. It smells delicious"_

When Sam saw that Dean got out of his shower after drinking his coffee, proceed to put the magazine on his brother's bed.

" _Is today my birthday? Just kidding. I got that from a movie"_

 _"_ _I don't know which movie are you talking about, but I don't care about it right now. Happy birthday Dean"_

 _"_ _Did you buy this magazine? And…the number of… Camille is on it? Geez! Best birthday ever! I can't believe that you bought this"_

 _"_ _Well, I had to"_

 _"_ _Why?"_

 _"_ _Man…"_

 _"_ _Okay. If you want to, I can let you borrow it, so you can have some fun. What do you think about that Sammy? It looks that I am gonna have some fun"_

 _"_ _You can go if you want to"_

 _"_ _Nah. I don't need another girl. I have you already"_

 _"…"_

 _"_ _Seriously man, I am not leaving you. However, you know that I don't like parties and all the stuff with it. Did you find us a hunt?"_

 _"_ _I was reading the newspaper, and I think that I did"_

 _"_ _What's the case about? Hope it's about Werewolves. I am daying to kill one"_

 _"_ _That wasn't funny Dean"_

 _"_ _It was! My jokes are the best. You used to laugh as a kid. I can see that you grown up to be a bittersweet man"_

 _"_ _Or your jokes suck"_

 _"_ _I tell you about the case while you are driving. It's only a couple of hours away"_

 _"_ _Alright Sam, you win"_

Dean walked towards his car, and Sam turned off the lights. He wanted to stay in that room for at least another day, but because it was Dean's birthday, he would do anything to make him happy. He loved that Jerk…

" _Come on Sammy! My patience is not made of gold!_

Sam sat next to Dean, and the Impala came to life. Another day, another case. That was how it was going to be, but with his brother by his side nothing else mattered

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hey! Long time, I know. First of all, thank you to all of the new followers and people who reviewed the second chapter. Let me know what do you think about this one, and if you want to, you can give me ideas for the one of the next chapters. Love ya guys** **J**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

 _Now I believe in what you say  
Is the undisputed truth  
But I have to have things my own way  
To keep me in my youth_

 _Like a ship without an anchor  
Like a slave without a chain  
Just the thought of those sweet ladies  
Sends a shiver through my veins_

 _And I will go on shining  
Shining like brand new  
I'll never look behind me  
My troubles will be few_

 _Goodbye stranger it's been nice  
Hope you find your paradise  
Tried to see your point of view  
Hope your dreams will all come true_

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE: THIS CHAPTER HAS SOME ALTERNATIVE SCENES FROM THE REAL STORY AND EVENTS THAT HAPPENED ON THE SHOW (S6). I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS, AND IF YOU DO PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW. IT'D HELP ME A LOT. THANK YOU FOR ALL THE SUPPORT GUYS**

YEAR 2011

Sam was watching the ceiling, as the man who he had cared more than his own life in the past, was deep asleep. He had checked the hour maybe five minutes ago and decided that it was too early to do anything. It was 05:22 AM, but he didn't feel tired. Sam didn't need to sleep anymore since he came back from hell. It was useful, because he was alert 24/7 and ready to kill whatever or whoever who would want to hurt him.

However, there was other reason (the most important one), why he was glad he couldn't sleep. That reason was hell. The vivid memories of what he had been through were bad enough even for the new and better version of him.

Since he couldn't feel practically anything, he would finish a job, and nothing really bothered him if something ended wrong respect to his original plan. If he couldn't save the victim, a simple "I did what I could" was enough for him to walk away from the bloody scene with a satisfactory smile on his face. The old Sam was weak and predictable. "Sammy" was just a pathetic child who had needed his brother around him to keep living since forever, which still bothered him every time he remembered that. Having a Family had represented weakness for him, because when he cared about his father and brother, he knew that the bad guys were able to hurt them in order to get what they wanted. Now, family was a benefit. When he had been with Samuel and his cousins he'd pretend to care about them, so they would protect him if he someday, needed to be saved. Now he was away from Samuel's way, and had Dean instead. He was as safe as he could be with him by his side.

When he saw his cellphone's screen remembered that it was January 24th, and knew that that day had been important for him. That day was Dean's birthday.

Every year he would bring some stupid present and say "Happy birthday" to his older sibling. Dean had never liked to remember his birthdays, so now he wouldn't push him to "celebrate" it anymore. He really didn't care about Dean. If he died, he would take it as the natural course of life. Everybody'd die someday, so there was no reason to get sad about it.

Sam got up one hour later to go and search for a hunt, but before he left the room saw that his bed was made since the other night. Dean didn't know that Sam couldn't just close his eyes and drift away from reality like he could. He would freak out and Sam didn't need that in his life at the moment. The "drama queen" of his brother had noticed that something was odd with him, and made a big speech saying that he was there to help him. When he lost his patience with Dean, said something that probably hurt his feelings, because he suddenly shut his mouth. Being without a soul didn't mean that he forgot how much he knew his brother. Sam could read him like an open book.

" _S'm"_

 _"_ _What?"_

 _"_ _What time is it?"_

 _"_ _06:24 AM"_

 _"_ _What are you doing up? It's too early to be loud in a silent room dude"_

 _"_ _Well, I am busy"_

 _"_ _Doing what?"_

 _"_ _Trying to find a case for us"_

 _"_ _We just finished the shifter case like seven hours ago. We could take a day for us, you know?"_

 _"_ _It's better this way. You keep sleeping"_

 _"_ _That's what I am gonna do, actually"_

Dean closed his eyes and thought about his brother. He seemed alert and vey awake after the difficult case that both had worked on. Sam was just… different. He didn't know how bad hell had affected him, but every time he asked something and met those cold hazel eyes that were not his brother's, decided that it was better not to know the answer.

Bobby talked to him and told him to wait. The old man was sure that it was just matter of time before his brother would come back to be the old Sam. Dean had waited for at least three months and Sam was the same weird man that was always hunting, barely taking a break, also killing people like they were sick and agonizing animals, without getting all his princess feelings like he used to. Dean didn't want to admit it, but he was scared. He wanted his little brother back, and he would fight for him. After all, it was his job, right? Look out for his pain in the ass little brother.

The older Winchester decided to relax his body and mind, and before he knew, was asleep again.

When Dean woke up saw that it was 09:23 AM. He saw the empty and undone bed next to his, but there was no sign of his brother. He hadn't even left a note, and he wasn't picking up his cellphone. He swore that someday he was going to kill that kid. Every day that he spent with him was getting him nervous and more thoughtful than usual. He didn't like to overthink things, because he got pissed or worried pretty easily. Sam was usually the one to do that and he just comforted him with some crappy quotes until Sam would give him a shy smile. That was how things used to work at least...

When he finished taking his bath, saw that Sam sitting in one of the beds cleaning his gun. He didn't seem to notice his anxiety, or maybe he was just ignoring him like he always did those days.

"Sam"

"Yeah"

"You left the room without telling me"

"I am a grown man, you know that right?"

"You know the rules man"

"So, I found a case and brought coffee for us"

Dean stared at him with a pissed face and decided to let go the unspoken conversation.

"What's about?"

"A girl went missing two days ago. Her parents said that she went to look out for her sister to a party but she never made it there. They found her body last night. She had bite marks all over her wrists and she lost a lot of blood"

"It seems that we are going to kill some vampires today"

"…"

Dean met the suffocating silence and Caught the newspaper that his brother threw at him after he finished cleaning the gun. He read the girl's parents declarations, but when he saw the date his thoughts went to another direction. That day was his birthday, and Sam didn't seem to care. He hadn't even said "Happy birthday" to him. He loved the moments when his brother brought some "Busty Asian Beauties" and sometimes other things for him. Not for the present though, but because his brother cared about him. He always had. Maybe those days were gone forever. What if the Sam he knew would never come back again?

"No"

"No what?"

"Nothing"

"What's going on?"

"Nothing man. Let's just go, alright?"

"Okay"

Dean put everything he owned inside his old duffel, and then he just walked away from the room and towards the car, not even looking at Sam. When his brother sat next to him, he just put AC/DC and drove with the song "Back in Black" sounding as loud as he could without causing a fight with his brother.

"You seem… upset maybe"

"No, Sam. I am just tired. That's it"

"I can drive if you want. I am not tired "

"You are not driving my baby. She's mine"

"Well, if you change your mind let me know"

"Sure Sammy. Like I am gonna change my mind"

"I was being polite"

"Well, that's not you at all Sam. You'd never say that. My brother would be a freaking mother right now, asking me to rest. You would insist until I said yes"

"You know what you are doing Dean. I am too. If you don't want me to drive I won't push you"

The older Winchester didn't answer that, but looked at the road in front of his eyes. It was going to be a long trip, and being honest, all that he wanted was to get out of the car to be alone. The only reason why he was still by his side was because Sam would never give up trying to help him get back to his normal self. He had to make his brother talk, and he wouldn't mind using the not passive way to get the answers that he wanted if he didn't talk . However, he knew that that day was far away, and for now, they had a case to solve…


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

 _I'm only a man with a candle to guide me,  
I'm taking a stand to escape what's inside me.  
A monster, a monster,  
I've turned into a monster,  
A monster, a monster,  
And it keeps getting stronger._

 _I never said that I want this,  
This burden came to me,  
And it's made its home inside_

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPSPNSPNSPNSPSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN**

 **2015**

JANUARY 24TH

Denver, Colorado.

 **DEAN'S POV**

Dean Winchester woke up in a motel room, full of broken beer bottles and a blonde woman by his side that covered her naked body only with the thin sheets of the place. He didn't remember leaving the bunker or even flirting with the pretty woman by his side, but all that he could say was that those kind of things had been happening a lot for the last five weeks. Unconsciously, Dean wanted to run away from his brother, because Sam had become a constant reminder of the monster he was becoming. The way he looked at him said more than words could, and it hurt to see his little brother trying to act like everything was fine. Sam was not stupid and Dean was not either, so the elder man knew that he was trying his best to save him, even if deep down knew that there was no cure.

The mark of Cain was affecting him in more ways than he had told Sam, and he was not sure how much time he could resist without taking the heavy mask off his face. The damn thing wanted him to kill, to lie and live to satisfy it. He was a slave in his own body!

When he fought Cain, he told him that he was living his life in reverse, and in the very end, he would kill his brother. The agonizing pain was going to change him, and he would end up becoming the thing that he hated the most, a freaking special black-eyed bitch.

It was 08:30 when he woke the girl up and told her that she had to leave. Sophia (knew later), didn't seem offended by the cold tone of his voice as she got dressed with her black short skirt, white T-shirt and red high heels. Once she was out, he decided to take a bath and have some breakfast, because he didn't remember when he ate for the last time. He was not really hungry, but that was how his routine was… or had been when he didn't have the mark on his arm. He had to keep doing what he used to, to feel human again. The hot water calmed his anxiety, and his sore muscles relaxed along with his messy thoughts. His little brother was probably freaking out (again), but he didn't want to deal with his "I was worried" speech for now. Sam was fine, he was (pretty much), sure of that.

One hour later, he was back in the room with coffee, donuts and a newspaper. Dean didn't have to search for a case for too long, since the second page detailed the case of a mother and a daughter being killed by their own father that in the camera record, had bright yellow eyes. A friend of him said that he had been with him the whole time, and it wasn't him the one who killed the women. Both men were now being interrogated, and Dean knew how that was going to end. Maybe people would be safer knowing what was out there, but that was not going to happen any time soon. Sometimes, it was better to live in ignorance than knowing the hurtful truth.

"Cheswold, Delaware; here I go", said as walked towards "Baby" and left town

 **Spnspnspnspnspnspnspnpsnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnpsnspn**

 **Meanwhile…**

Lebanon, Kansas.

 **SAM'S POV**

Sam tried to call Dean again, but received the same answer. His cellphone had been turned off, and he didn't know what do. For the past few weeks, his brother had gone to bars and come back a day or two later, but he always called him or texted him to let him know he was alright after he woke up half sober. He could see his brother changing, and it seemed that even having the Book of the Damned, there was no way to help Dean with the Mark of Cain. Rowena was working as slow as she could, also using him to buy her food or even other things that she needed. He hated to be told what to do, but it was a means necessary for the desired purpose. Maybe, Dean could be saved, so he had to be patient. Rowena was his last hope. Dean had rescued him from himself and from other as well more times than he could count, and now it was his turn. His big brother would never give up on him. They were brothers, and after all the things that both had been through together, he owe him that, even if the cost was his own life.

Two hours later, he called Cass asking for help. The angel came as soon as possible, but he didn't have any answers either. Dean had turned the car's GPS off, and there was no way to know where he could be. Sam was sure that his brother was fine. If he would be hurt, he was going to chain him and never let him go again. Being honest, he had tried to stop him a couple of times, but his reactions were more violent as the days went by, and he was scared of him. That was not his brother, because Dean would never talk with sharp words or punches when it came to him. He had been the best big brother than everyone wished to have, however, those days were now gone. He missed Dean, and somehow he felt that everything was his fault. Dean wouldn't have taken the mark if he hadn't pushed him to go that night.

It was 12:14 AM when he called Dean again. When he noticed that the phone had been turned on, waited anxious, wishing to hear his brother's voice. Dean didn't pick up at the first call, but in the second try, heard His brother's voice on the other side of the line.

"Sam, what do you want?"

"Where are you man? You left in the middle of the night when I was sleeping and…"

"I am busy right now Sam", said Dean interrupting him

"What are you doing? Tell me where you are and I'll go meet you"

"No little brother. I am better on my own for now. You should… read some geek book or watch Netflix. I am fine, I promise", said Dean ending the call right after

"Yeah, sure", said Sam out loud throwing his cell phone on his bed really frustrated.

He realized about his brother's birthday few hours after his last call, when his cell phone made him remember. He had never forgotten Dean's birthdays before, because he was the one that usually remember his elder brother about his special day. Obviously, Dean would not be coming back any time soon and he was not going to answer him again either, so he decided to do something for him. It was pathetic, but considering the circumstances, it was the only thing that he could do.

 **18 HOURS LATER…**

January 25th

 **DEAN'S POV**

The elder Winchester came back to the bunker after a complication with the shapeshifter hunt. When the disgusting creature was chasing him, he considered calling brother, but as soon as the idea crossed his mind, disappeared. Sam would be safer doing whatever he was doing in Kansas, so he just exhaled and got ready for another round. By the time he killed it, it was the middle of the night and his body was sore and bloody. He had cut his side while running, but even if it was not deep, had become infected and it hurt a lot. Luckily, he had the first aid kit, so he could cure himself before he drove back home. He didn't bother trying to find his brother, because he was tired, and all that he wanted to do was close his eyes for few hours. Maybe at the next day he would leave again, or stay in his room, just getting out to pick up some food and beer, ignoring his brother. His old himself would have hated him, but that Dean was far away and not coming back for now, or ever better said.

He walked slowly towards his room, turned on the light saw that over his pillow, there was a little note. When he opened it, saw that it was from Sam.

" **Dean:**

 **I don't know when you're gonna read this, but I want to wish you a Happy Birthday. It's stupid to say that, considering that you are going through a lot. Maybe this way I can to remember you that I care about you, and if you ever need to talk, I'll be right there to hear you.**

 **Sammy** "

Dean didn't remember his birthday, and it had been yesterday! He had to be there for his brother, and stop running away from him. Sam had done the same thing when he was drinking demon blood, and he got mad as well, but after few years he told him that he was glad he did that to him. Sam had needed him and hadn't known how to say that. Being honest, he needed his brother too, because deep down he knew that he was the only one that could make him put his feet on the ground.

He ran towards his brother's room and opened the door. Sam was out of the count and snoring. Dean could tell how pale he was, and thinner than usual as well. He had been too selfish to think only about hi to notice how his brother deteriorated right in front of his own two eyes. That was going to change, because Sam was going to have his old Dean back.

"Sammy, wake up!"

"D'n? You ok?", asked Sam still sleepy

"Yes, little brother. I am more than ok"

Dean practically dragged Sam out of his room and made him go with him to the kitchen. He prepared beacon and salad, while Sam looked at him surprised.

"You haven't acted like this in a long time Dean. Something's wrong with you"

"You were right about me being distant… I am here for you Sam, and I won't let you down again. I promise"

"You've never let me down Dean. I don't understand a lot of what you're going through, but I am willing to help you if you let me", said Sam using his puppy dog eyes

"Truth is… that I am scared Sam. The mark is changing me, and I don't want to end like Cain"

"We will find a way to save you Dee. You're my brother, and there's nothing I wouldn't do for you"

"Okay. Enough of this chick-flick moment. Now, eat your salad or I'll kick your ass. You look like an extra from the walking dead Sam. If you get thinner you'll disappear"

"Lately I have forgotten to eat. I am sorry"

"You should be. But don't worry about that anymore. I am here to make you chubby and put you in the oven like the witch should have done with Hansel and Gretel"

"You never mentioned watching that movie", said Sam laughing

"Shut up bitch. I… watched it one time and that's it. You watched Cinderella, remember Samantha?"

"You're a jerk Dean"

"I know", said Dean laughing, watching Sam smile for the first time in a long time. They were going to be fine, he told to himself.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE: HI GUYS! HERE'S ANOTHER CHAPTER FOR THIS STORY, THAT BEING HONEST I AM ENJOYING TO WRITE SO MUCH! THE NEXT CHAPTER MIGHT BE THE LAST ONE, BUT I AM NOT SURE YET. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGERENCE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER, LET ME KNOW. I LOVE SUGGERENCES AND REVIEWS TOO. SEE YA ON THE NEXT CHAPTER!**

 **P.S: THANK YOU FOR THE AWESOME REVIEWS! YOU ARE AWESOME GUYS** **J**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

My name it means nothing  
my fortune is less  
My future is shrouded in dark wilderness  
Sunshine is far away, clouds linger on  
Everything I possessed - Now they are gone

The world is a lonely place when you're on your own

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN**

YEAR 2017

JANUARY 24th

00:00 Hs.

 **PRISON**

Dean was sitting on his bed lost in his thoughts, living just another day of his cursed life.

The four claustrophobic walls that surrounded and held Sam and Dean inside prison were everything that both men had had for the past six weeks. Dean had been counting the days trying keep his mind sane, but after the third week, he gave up trying to figure out which day or month was. Time was relative, and even if he could have a pocket watch, he knew that it would just make him feel worse than he already was. Losing the track of time could be the best thing that ever happened to him, actually.

The only thing that made him feel a little better was the so famous and sometimes irritating "Chow Time", that represented the only "contact" with another human being that he had, and if he was really lucky, would receive food that smelled good and not rotten. The flavor was awful with or without the disgusting smell, but after all that he had been through; he could only see eatable food. He was hungry all the time, and be fed twice a day was something that he hated. In the bunker he'd eat at any hour, and not only because of his busy agenda while hunting. Even when the elder hunter had free days, he still liked to wake up after drinking some beers, and eat greasy food every day. Sam of course, being the control bitch that he was, kept telling him that he was going to have a heart attack someday if he kept killing himself slowly with those things. Usually, he just said "Okay, mom" as an answer, seeing his brother's bitch face every time. It sounded weird, but he liked to see those bitch faces. It was almost gratifying to bother his brother, because if he could make him be frustrated, it meant that they were fine with each other, and not breaking their brotherly bond again.

Since their first day and once a week, a man with a very mad face and white hair paid them a visit, saying that the loneliness were going to drive them crazy, making them in a future, scream and beg to talk about the supposed "attack" to the president of the United States.

He never said a word and neither did his brother, or so he supposed. Even if they'd talk, they were going to considered them crazy, which would end with both of them in an asylum for the rest of their days. He could imagine being under the effect of strong meds and a straitjacket, incapacitating them from doing their job and taking them away from what was real.

After many days alone, the words of the man started to resonate inside his head, and the silence started to depress him. His hope to get out had already started to fade away, so there was nothing left but agony and desperation. Being honest, he hadn't asked how his brother was, because knowing from head to toe his kid brother, already knew how he was. He hadn't talked out loud or called his name, which was terrifying.

God… he thought that he would never think about this ever again, but he missed his pain in the ass little brother more than he could admit. He had never been good with the feelings and… all the tears or hugs that came with them, but one of the many nights being there, the elder Winchester let the barrier go down, and a single man tear slid down his face.

When he was not thinking about his brother, other things came to his mind, and they weren't good either…

When was the last time that he had seen the sun, or even smell the characteristic aroma of rain and wet soil? He'd give everything he had to be one minute out of there, and he knew how screwed he was saying that.

He and his brother were in jail because they saved the whole freaking world from the Devil itself! And how did people said thank them?... Sending them to prison! They didn't deserve that, but no one would help them this time. Castiel's radio was off, and their mother was absent again. She had been since she left the bunker for the first time, and being honest, Dean was still holding onto the hope that someday everything would change and Mary could be the mother that he and Sammy needed.

The rest of the day, the special day that didn't remember, went just like the other ones. Nothing changed… It just another day...

Some cells away, Sam was almost in the same situation as his brother. He had always broken easier than he had, but words would never come out of his mouth anyways. He'd rather kill himself before saying a single word. Nothing could make feel relaxed for a minute, and the nightmares that he had were not helping to the case.

The walls that surrounded him made him remember about his time in the cage, when Lucifer made him be just another toy to have fun with. Sometimes, he would dream that the devil appeared inside his jail, saying "We're finally alone, Sammy. Just like the old good times, right?" using mind control to pin him to the walls and the ceiling, making him burn slowly. . He usually woke up breathing fast, feeling like he was going to die, but after few minutes, recovered his normal path of breathing, making exercise to distract his mind for a little while. That was life in prison, and the hope that he had had to make a "prison break" move to escape was gone by now. He had been four weeks… or maybe even more. Being honest, he didn't know and didn't want to care either. He couldn't see when the sun was up, or when the moon claimed the main position, so he just closed his eyes and tried to avoid the feeling that nothing would change. Maybe he would become crazy someday. That thought made sense, actually. Being held there for the rest of his miserable life was not something that him or anybody else would wish.

Needless to say, he never remembered his brother's birthday, but if he would have been free, let me tell you that he would have done some sort of party with Cass and even Mary in the bunker. Without meaning to, Sam fell asleep, and when he opened his eyes, saw the devil carrying a very bloody Dean in his arms, cold and dead

"Now it's your turn, Sammy boy…", said the Devil dropping the body to the ground

Sam screamed and tried to wake up, without successful results. The only thing that he could do then, was take a deep breath and let another torture session begin…

 **THE END.-**

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE: HEY GUYS! I DON'T KNOW IF YOU WILL LIKE THIS CHAPTER, BUT I SWEAR THAT I TRIED MY BEST.**

 **ANYWAYS, THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT AND LOVE TOWARDS THIS FIC. I HAVE A LOT OF SHORT FICS THAT I WILL BE WRITING SOON!**

 **IF YOU LIKED IT, PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW** **J**


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